How much time do you think you have wasted dwelling on the past and the future? If you were to calculate it, you might be stunned. And yet, neither the past nor the future have anything to do with right now, the only reality that is “real”, where your truest chance for peace, contentment, and happiness exists. Sounds crazy to waste such an opportunity, doesn’t it? And yet, most people I know spend too little time in the present.

Spending any real time in the past or the future instead of enjoying your time in the present, especially with those whom you love, is a tragedy.

Some of us have kids and we sadly spend inordinate amounts of time ignoring them, even manufacturing lifestyles with built-in excuses portrayed as “noble” as to why this is the case. Others of us are simply preoccupied with our own personal drama. Meanwhile, everyone laments that kids grow up so fast, quipping about it but then pressing on in their personal dysfunction. Selfishness will do that.

If you have kids and you fail to be present for them, you’re failing them, terribly, as a parent. Simply put, it’s impossible to be present if you’re never around or if you’re physically present but too busy spending time in your own head. This latter case may be even more damaging to your kids because what you’re saying is that even though they are right in front of you, present for you, they’re not important enough for you to be present for them.

Your presence is required for the sake of others, whether it’s your children (whom God blessed you with), your spouse (whom you chose), or your church, even (which God called you to).

But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
- 1 Timothy 5:8

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
- Ephesians 6:4

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.
- Psalm 127:3

And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.
- Hebrews 10:24-25

Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.
- James 1:27

How often do we hear of children who were raised in the faith from an early age straying as an adolescent? How often do we hear them say, once they have returned to the fold, that love is what brought them back? What is love if it’s just a word?

True love cannot help but express itself. The greatest expression is simply being there for others, through thick and thin, not just in word, but in deed.

By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him?

Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.
- 1 John 3:16-18

To be present for others is to love them. This one thing may be the most important gift you can ever give someone, far better than any other type of gift or even words of encouragement untethered to action. Being present proves your love, that your words aren’t empty promises, that the sacrifices you make for them are real, and that you’re with them right now, when it matters most.

Love in Christ,

Ed Collins